pink bracelets

Pink

Today, my 17-year-old daughter reminded me to wear pink for the fight against breast cancer.

17 years and 6 months ago breast cancer killed my mother. So, I don’t need reminders to support breast cancer research and to get my mammogram or do regular lump checks. 

My Mom’s cancer didn’t form a lump and it didn’t show up on her mammogram. The first symptom was lethargy and a red rash on the skin of her breast. When she was diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer It had already spread like confetti. She endured a round of Chemo which bought her a summer of remission. In Mom’s usual way, she made friends with her caregivers. She hugged her Oncologist, discussed her deepest secrets with the lady in the next chemo chair, and prayed with all her visitors.

The day after we found out cancer had returned and she would not survive was a very difficult one for us as a family, and for the nation. It was 9/11/2001. Everyone in the nation was distressed, not just our family. 

Some cancers are cooperative. They politely die with chemo and radiation. Some disappear on their own, fought off by the body. Some kill quickly like the neighbor’s lung cancer–2 weeks from diagnosis to death. But some cancers, like my Mom’s, are monsters. These monster cancers are experts in pain and disfigurement. The last 6 months of her life were very difficult for Mom and all who loved her. Each day during the final month I wondered how she could possibly live one more day. Her arm swelled from edema and the skin split. Painful blisters formed that we would paint with topical anesthetic each night so she could get some sleep. Her other arm swelled up so she could no longer feed herself. So, it was a relief when she finally breathed her last.

Advice:

  1. Wear Pink
  2. Breastfeed
  3. Get regular mammograms
  4. Do self-checks
  5. Eat healthy food and get daily exercise
  6. Panic if you find any symptoms. My friend had a red rash on her breast and followed my advice. Her rash was Shingles! It was easy to treat and disappeared completely.
  7. Breast cancer happens to males, and females, old and young. PANIC until you are proven cancer-free.
  8. Don’t waste time trying to answer the question; “WHY?” It is a useless question. The tendency toward breast cancer can be inherited and occurs more often in chubby older women. But that information can only harm you. The best question is; “How can I fight this?” 
  9. Live each day as if it is a gift. Make the world a better place because you are alive. Bring into the world your own brand of kindness.
  10. A coffin or urn is heading your way much too quickly. Be grateful for each day. 
  11. Support breast cancer research, support students in medical school, support Hospice, and volunteer in any way you can.
  12. Forgive God. It isn’t His fault that cancer exists. It isn’t His fault that he didn’t give Mom a miracle. Open the conversation. Pray.